Dinner out with kids

To me, going out to eat is one of life's greatest pleasures. Few things beat a delicious meal, good drinks, and spending time with people you love. I even like the build up of picking the place to go - reading the reviews, hemming and hawing over which cuisine to settle on, and thinking about the meal I'm going to have on the drive over.

Yes, my idea of entertainment is a good meal out.

Enter kids.

They change everything. Not always in a bad way, mind you, but since we've had children, going out to eat is a different experience and a different form of entertainment (both for us and the people around us).

Take last night for example. My grandmother has been in town for a few days and wanted to treat us to a meal. We chose P.F. Chang's because it's delicious yet kid friendly. As soon as we sit down, Grace attacks the kiddie menu with a crayon. Two seconds later, she's done and ready to get up. Of course we haven't even see our server yet, so this child is gonna hafta wait a couple hours.

My job as the one sitting next to her was to distract her by any means possible. This was a challenge as I was rifling through the diaper bag looking for something to give her to play with. She was getting impatient and starting to arch her back in her high chair. She threw the crayon and menu on the floor. I now feel people's eyes on our table.

Then I discovered that P.F. Chang's has chopsticks in their silverware roll-up they give you! Drum sticks! Perfect. Child one satisfied.

Timothy, however, was not happy. He was fussing because he was hungry. However he didn't want the bottle that we brought. In his mind he was thinking that Mommy was right there, so why should he have to settle for a bottle? He could get the milk right from its source. Apparently our four-month-old has a discerning palate already. This will be good when people try to tell him Outback has good steaks but not now. Not when we're trying to pass once-frozen milk off as fresh.

He also needed a diaper change. I took him since The Wife was in the corner of the booth. The baby pass over the top of the table (and the candle flame!) was successful. Baby and diaper changing accessories in hand, I made my way through the tables towards the restrooms. As a father, this walk to the bathroom is always done with a reoccurring thought: "Will this restaurant have a baby changing station in the men's room?"

I then have flashbacks to the time that Grace was two months old and had to change her in the four-inch space between two sinks. That was the time I discovered I could change a diaper with one hand as I supported her head with the other. That was also the only time I've ever come close to accidentally dropping one of our kids.

I am happy to report P.F. Chang's is one of the few restaurants that actually recognizes fathers as having an active roll in child raising. They have a changing station, and it works. It's not marked up with graffiti. The hinges work. Someone has cleaned it recently. Timothy and I are both happy - for a few minutes any way.

Back at the table, he got fussy again. He still wouldn't take the bottle from The Wife. Another baby pass over the table (there were about 15 this night) and back to me to try. He wouldn't take the bottle from me either, but I managed to get him to stop crying.

It's amazing what a father will do in public to keep their children happy. It's also amazing that I don't really care what people think either. Rousing renditions of the ABCs and "Pat-a-cake" with both kids drew laughter and smiles from them and certainly more than a few looks from people who would rather talk politics and sports rather than listen to my off-key singing. I should also mention I am a pro at the "bounce and shush." I spent a good portion of the meal standing and bouncing, rocking and swaying Timothy while humming and shushing in his ear to keep him quiet.

I should mention a couple things in closing. First, both of our kids are generally wonderful, obedient, and calm at restaurants. I know this because other diners have come up to tell us this. Secondly, Grace wound up settling in to her high chair captivity and even enjoyed her low mein noodles (she actually used chopsticks too!).

And it's watching moments like that that still make going out to eat one of life's great pleasures for me.

Halloween and confidence

It's amazing what parents will put themselves through to ensure their child has fun. However - speaking as a subject matter expert - kids under two rarely cooperate.

We have family in town this week, and since last night was Halloween we thought it would be fun to get everyone dressed up and go trick or treating at our church's annual "Trunk or Treat." More on that in a minute. The whole event really started when we first put everyone in costumes.

Timothy, being four months old, was pretty indifferent to the whole thing. The visiting cousins, especially the oldest, were pretty excited about dressing up. And I figured Grace would be too. She had happily picked out her costume at the store (a cow) and mooed at it when she saw me take it off the hanger to get her ready. I thought she'd be equally as thrilled to wear it. Not so much.

Her first words when she looked at herself in the mirror?

"All done. All done."

But of course, we parents weren't done. We had to mark this special occasion with photos. Here's the best shot I could get:

"Trunk or Treat" was really cool. Tons of costumes, tons of candy, and a 30-foot inflatable slide. Each of the 50 or so cars that kids could walk up to were decorated to a theme. There was a pirate ship, more than a few luaus, and an homage to Charlie Brown's Great Pumpkin.

Grace may not have been excited before, but I thought for sure she'd turn when she saw all of this going on. Not so much.

There were probably about 500 people when we showed up. The crowd, the noise, and a bunch of weird costumes equaled this reaction:

She immediately wanted to be held. Every trunk we went to, she'd bury her face in my shoulder. Our daughter usually will go to any outstretched arms, but she clung on to me for dear life. Timothy, still indifferent, passed out in the stroller.

Grace eventually let go of me and went with The Wife to go up to trunks. She, with much more patience than me, was able to convince our daughter to let go and start walking up to people to get candy. So as the evening progressed, our little cow got a little bit more confidence and even started to enjoy herself.

I really enjoyed myself too. I was proud watching her waddle up to a trunk in her overstuffed costume, looking up at the person holding all the candy, and sticking out her treat bag. Her overcoming fears and gaining confidence had me beaming.

So, even though Halloween for us started a bit hectic, and we may have forced costumes and picture time on our children, I think the effort was worth it in the end. Through the strange tradition of dressing up and approaching strangers to get candy, our daughter grew.